How to choose the right partner – Dating doesn’t have to be fun and games. As you age, you’ll find yourself mulling over your relationships and looking for something more meaningful than a fling that barely lasts a few months.
Consider settling down with a single person for many years to come. When you think about spending the rest of your life with a partner, choosing the right life partner becomes more daunting than it already is.
Unlike the older days, dating back to barely a few decades ago, people used to choose their partners from the get-go, be it love at first sight or arranged partnerships.
However, rash decisions for such a sensitive matter aren’t recommended – a ton could have gone wrong, and the stakes are all the higher nowadays.
If you’ve already been in a few past relationships, you know how much time and effort is invested in the relationship.
Although initial infatuation may make it seem like your partner could do no wrong, their inherent flaws are laid back for you to see over time. More often than not, these flaws and differences make us break off from them.
Reflect on your past:
Although it may not seem like a pleasant trip, the initial step you need to take is to reflect on your past. Think about all your relationships; all that glitters is not gold, both romantic and platonic. Consider the partners you’ve had before now, and ask yourself a few questions:
- Were they stable relationships?
- What did you like most about these relationships?
- What didn’t you like?
- Did you like yourself when you were in a relationship?
Answering these questions will give you some idea about what you want in your new partner. Remember that you are looking for a partner, not another half of you.
Being ready doesn’t mean you have an arsenal of tools or equipment to help you throughout the relationship. Instead, you must be mentally ready for a relationship, particularly a long-lasting one.
Even if you desire a new relationship with all your heart and soul, you may need more time to be mentally ready.
If you’ve recently ended a relationship with someone, chances are you’re only looking for a relationship to fill that gap in your life. Make sure you are ready for a new person and prepared to uphold your end of the commitment.
Choosing the right partner involves more than being “in love” with them. Although being in love might give you all the butterflies and heartwarming feelings, it is still an emotional response. As a result, you might be willing to make some of the previous mistakes that ruined your relationships.
You need to catch yourself and make sure you are not acting based on your fleeting feelings alone.
Starting a relationship with someone might be based on mutual love, but that is not what sustains it – what maintains a long relationship is commitment, same things consideration, respect, and compromise.
You must consider all these aspects and whether you will give this much to a relationship. If your potential life partner is willing to do the same page and backs up their words with their actions, that’s a good sign.
Communication is essential in all stages of life. At the beginning of a new relationship, talk to your partner. Dig deeper than surface-level attraction. Ask them about their core values, beliefs, life goals, opinions, and personalities.
It would be best to have somebody who would complement your personality and not be against everything you hold dear to you.
Serious conversations are a foundation for a good life partner– they show that both sides are ready to commit and willing to talk about anything of consequence.
If your potential partner’s values and beliefs do not align with yours, making you deeply uncomfortable, don’t feel you owe them anything: have the courage to walk away.
It’s essential to know how connected a potential partner with similar interests is to their family members and the quality of these relationships.
Keep an open mind
As important as it is to get your point across and find the perfect person for yourself, it is equally important to keep an open mind.
Today, we’re all for instant gratification – if something doesn’t fit our expectations, we throw it away.
When it comes to choosing a partner, there are only so many people who will be interested in a relationship.
Therefore, it’s important not to write people off when you assume something negative about them.
There is a huge possibility that you will find someone who fits the criteria you’ve created. This is where compromise comes in.
If both of you are willing to give the relationship enough time and effort and commit to each other, then you don’t have much to worry about.
Don’t judge on sight.
Last but not least, remember to keep looking and trying to find the right partner. You won’t find your best life partner on the first try.
Humans aren’t perfect, so don’t expect somebody to be your perfect partner. Don’t lose hope. Keep an open mind, and you’ll find your lifetime partner one day!
Choosing a life partner means you need to connect with them on the surface level and spiritually.
A strong spiritual connection is proof enough of whether a potential partner is the right person for you. So if you feel your soul is forming a connection with that one person, go for it! Your soul speaks what your mind often ignores.